It's amazing what a little bit of sleep can do for a person's mood .. I had no idea!! I feel like a new girl .. well a new old person .. hahaha!!
So .. oddly enough, my sister FINALLY got to go home tonight. In a nutshell all they were doing was keeping her in the hospital medicating her and so they decided that she could do the same thing at home. Plus, I'm betting if I wanted to get better and I was her, it would be easier to do in my condo, in the presence of my hubby and dogs.
So .. of course it was the perfect reason to come home and go straight to bed!! It's a great thing that I went to the gym this morning because I had nothing else planned besides going to the hospital and another load of laundry (which is running now).
So .. I feel great .. all that tension from coworker seems non-existent, Granted the problems still need to be solved, but I enjoy the 98% of my life that is stress - free. That build up of no sleep, no time, coworker screw up, ... is not fun to get stressed over. I guess if I can contain it until I can 'release' it, then it's not worth doing otherwise, but of course sometimes that's probably hard to near impossible. Blah blah, right? Dang can this chic run her mouth, eh?!
Aside from my throwing random photos up on my flickr page, I have not had time to look around Not at work, not at home. Being in my horrid horrid photo slump I decided to look through my own stream for a change, in a desperate attempt to inspire myself since I have yet to find it any other way. In the process I come across this photo:
which leads me to the corresponding blog by yours truly.
So .. it's been about three months, maybe it's a sign that I need to regroup and see how I'm doing on everything I want to. Yea, I know, I should have posted goals or something, but seriously I ramble too much as it is ... I'm guessing it's a blessing in disguise :o)
Well maybe I'll set some now so I can kick myself in three more months.
Overall Goals (I may add to this as I think of more):
1. Get in shape. By saying this my intention was never to go on a diet and lost weight. Instead I want to (A) eat much better than I was eating in May and (B) get myself into a habit of going to the gym in order to get in shape and stay somewhat ahead of this whole aging game.
2. Start making an attempt to open up to people. This has to be one of my biggest flaws I think. At first, when I started doing it I enjoyed the privacy and the comfort in knowing that is a personal crisis I could hold it together pretty well. Then, it became a pride thing and when people would start to bring up the topic of my personal life, I'd get all uncomfortable and such. My goal is to try and start chipping down that wall and see what's behind it. I've written off a lot of things that were once personal goals because I thought that I had evolved into a person with different wants and needs, but before I commit to that I just want to be sure. Plus, this whole closed up think can't be that healthy.
3. Finish my Master's Degree. I am dreading going back to school. I have this theory that why do I need it when I have the job and am getting paid pretty well. But my company wants me to have it and the progression scale is a bit faster with one in my back pocket. Also, I am eligible to test for my PE (professional engineer's license) next year so this may be a good way to prep for that.
4. Stop being so lazy when it comes to my house. If I could I'd hire a maid, a cook, and gardener, you name it. I hate doing chores!
5. Find peace in regards to some of my personal demons and work on feeling better about me. Ok this is vague but I can't really be too specific without boring someone, including myself. We all have loose ends, quirks, bad habits, etc. and I just wanted to clean some of them up.
6. Become more committed to things. I'm bad about letting things slide that aren't a super priority to me. Here's a good example .. my yard. I could cut it one weekend so that it stays nice, short, and clean looking, but it's not that tall so why not wait another day or two. Then, it's the middle of the week, 6 in the evening, hot as sin, and I'm outside killing myself because I can't commit to cutting the yard consistently. Stop doing that!!!!!!!!
Ok .. I'll add more later.
How am I doing??
1. Get in shape. So far I'm running with this goal... literally. I had about a week slump where I only went once that week, but outside of that it's been consistent. I hired a trainer to make sure that when I try and quit going to the gym I have a reason to keep. Granted it's not the cheapest thing in the world, but at my 'weak' moment that is probably exactly what kept me from bailing. So at least I'm not paying for a membership that I don't use! I'm now going to start going to the gym in the morning before work to see if I can handle that. After today, having this whole evening open is really something I could get used to. I am also walking / running on alternate days during my lunch, when everyone is healthy and when it's 101 degrees outside. So far I've made milestones, but I still have more I want to do.
2. Start making an attempt to open up to people. Probably not doing so good here. I have started talking to friends that I'm comfortable with, so give me some credit for that. I've become more honest with myself and things that are going on instead of just pushing them off. That's been interesting as I've learned things about myself and my friends that I never saw before. Still .. I pretty much suck at this. I guess I open up to people on a case by case basis, but for me, it's easier to open to a 'new' person because they don't already know everything about me and it's nice to build on a clean slate. It's hard to go backward without hitting a bunch of bumps along the way.
3. Finish my Master's Degree. This has been on my work calendar as a reminder for a month now, but I have at least talked to my boss about the tuition reimbursement. However that is not going to get me enrolled so I need to get on this. If not, I pretty much have to wait another year in order to get back into the class rotation.
4. Stop being so lazy when it comes to my house. Yep .. I suck at this. However, I find a boy down the street that wants to cut my grass for me whenever the temperature cools down and we get out of this drought :o) .. so even though I'm not doing it myself, I'm getting it taken care of. I don't know if I'll even cook in my house .. it's not worth cooking for one, but I need to work on my house so that I can one day sell it and move elsewhere. We'll check back in a few more months and see how hard I need to kick myself over this one.
5. Find peace in regards to some of my personal demons and work on feeling better about me. I've done a few things here ... I've started spending more time with the people that I feel better around and have more fun with. I guess they're closer friends anyway for that reason. Also I have revisited with friends and exes of the past to see how they're doing. There are people that were in my life in the past that I care about and like to stay in touch with. I've gotten in touch with quite a few of them actually, which has been good for the most part. The hard part is revisiting the exes and saying no when they try and start something again. That I've had to do a few times now but it's nice to know they're still interested. I've been sucking at making more time for me, but I think that will only change when I have reason enough to put my foot down, as far as I have something else that is a priority or I hit my breaking point in starving myself for some 'me' time.
6. Become more committed to things. I am not doing so good here either and I think that started out with easy commitments is what will give me the courage to commit on a more serious level. I'm committed to the easy things that require little extended effort on my part, my job, the dogs, IMPS which is the rescue I work with the most, my family, trying to further develop my career. However, I am dodging all the big things, or at least those 'bigger' steps that I really want and need to take. However, I am pretty committed to not only the gym but getting in shape on my own (as I'm running on my lunch hour) so I guess that's something in itself, right?
So .. in three months, I've made progress in some areas and I'm still sucking in others. While it sucks exercising so much I enjoy the feeling afterwards and I like seeing the results slowly appear. I think that as that progresses further the rest will probably fall into place or at least make progress in that direction, because I'm guessing my mood will improve even more so that things will be easier to get into.
I need to add a new goal .. quit rambling so dang much!!
So .. oddly enough, my sister FINALLY got to go home tonight. In a nutshell all they were doing was keeping her in the hospital medicating her and so they decided that she could do the same thing at home. Plus, I'm betting if I wanted to get better and I was her, it would be easier to do in my condo, in the presence of my hubby and dogs.
So .. of course it was the perfect reason to come home and go straight to bed!! It's a great thing that I went to the gym this morning because I had nothing else planned besides going to the hospital and another load of laundry (which is running now).
So .. I feel great .. all that tension from coworker seems non-existent, Granted the problems still need to be solved, but I enjoy the 98% of my life that is stress - free. That build up of no sleep, no time, coworker screw up, ... is not fun to get stressed over. I guess if I can contain it until I can 'release' it, then it's not worth doing otherwise, but of course sometimes that's probably hard to near impossible. Blah blah, right? Dang can this chic run her mouth, eh?!
Aside from my throwing random photos up on my flickr page, I have not had time to look around Not at work, not at home. Being in my horrid horrid photo slump I decided to look through my own stream for a change, in a desperate attempt to inspire myself since I have yet to find it any other way. In the process I come across this photo:
which leads me to the corresponding blog by yours truly.
So .. it's been about three months, maybe it's a sign that I need to regroup and see how I'm doing on everything I want to. Yea, I know, I should have posted goals or something, but seriously I ramble too much as it is ... I'm guessing it's a blessing in disguise :o)
Well maybe I'll set some now so I can kick myself in three more months.
Overall Goals (I may add to this as I think of more):
1. Get in shape. By saying this my intention was never to go on a diet and lost weight. Instead I want to (A) eat much better than I was eating in May and (B) get myself into a habit of going to the gym in order to get in shape and stay somewhat ahead of this whole aging game.
2. Start making an attempt to open up to people. This has to be one of my biggest flaws I think. At first, when I started doing it I enjoyed the privacy and the comfort in knowing that is a personal crisis I could hold it together pretty well. Then, it became a pride thing and when people would start to bring up the topic of my personal life, I'd get all uncomfortable and such. My goal is to try and start chipping down that wall and see what's behind it. I've written off a lot of things that were once personal goals because I thought that I had evolved into a person with different wants and needs, but before I commit to that I just want to be sure. Plus, this whole closed up think can't be that healthy.
3. Finish my Master's Degree. I am dreading going back to school. I have this theory that why do I need it when I have the job and am getting paid pretty well. But my company wants me to have it and the progression scale is a bit faster with one in my back pocket. Also, I am eligible to test for my PE (professional engineer's license) next year so this may be a good way to prep for that.
4. Stop being so lazy when it comes to my house. If I could I'd hire a maid, a cook, and gardener, you name it. I hate doing chores!
5. Find peace in regards to some of my personal demons and work on feeling better about me. Ok this is vague but I can't really be too specific without boring someone, including myself. We all have loose ends, quirks, bad habits, etc. and I just wanted to clean some of them up.
6. Become more committed to things. I'm bad about letting things slide that aren't a super priority to me. Here's a good example .. my yard. I could cut it one weekend so that it stays nice, short, and clean looking, but it's not that tall so why not wait another day or two. Then, it's the middle of the week, 6 in the evening, hot as sin, and I'm outside killing myself because I can't commit to cutting the yard consistently. Stop doing that!!!!!!!!
Ok .. I'll add more later.
How am I doing??
1. Get in shape. So far I'm running with this goal... literally. I had about a week slump where I only went once that week, but outside of that it's been consistent. I hired a trainer to make sure that when I try and quit going to the gym I have a reason to keep. Granted it's not the cheapest thing in the world, but at my 'weak' moment that is probably exactly what kept me from bailing. So at least I'm not paying for a membership that I don't use! I'm now going to start going to the gym in the morning before work to see if I can handle that. After today, having this whole evening open is really something I could get used to. I am also walking / running on alternate days during my lunch, when everyone is healthy and when it's 101 degrees outside. So far I've made milestones, but I still have more I want to do.
2. Start making an attempt to open up to people. Probably not doing so good here. I have started talking to friends that I'm comfortable with, so give me some credit for that. I've become more honest with myself and things that are going on instead of just pushing them off. That's been interesting as I've learned things about myself and my friends that I never saw before. Still .. I pretty much suck at this. I guess I open up to people on a case by case basis, but for me, it's easier to open to a 'new' person because they don't already know everything about me and it's nice to build on a clean slate. It's hard to go backward without hitting a bunch of bumps along the way.
3. Finish my Master's Degree. This has been on my work calendar as a reminder for a month now, but I have at least talked to my boss about the tuition reimbursement. However that is not going to get me enrolled so I need to get on this. If not, I pretty much have to wait another year in order to get back into the class rotation.
4. Stop being so lazy when it comes to my house. Yep .. I suck at this. However, I find a boy down the street that wants to cut my grass for me whenever the temperature cools down and we get out of this drought :o) .. so even though I'm not doing it myself, I'm getting it taken care of. I don't know if I'll even cook in my house .. it's not worth cooking for one, but I need to work on my house so that I can one day sell it and move elsewhere. We'll check back in a few more months and see how hard I need to kick myself over this one.
5. Find peace in regards to some of my personal demons and work on feeling better about me. I've done a few things here ... I've started spending more time with the people that I feel better around and have more fun with. I guess they're closer friends anyway for that reason. Also I have revisited with friends and exes of the past to see how they're doing. There are people that were in my life in the past that I care about and like to stay in touch with. I've gotten in touch with quite a few of them actually, which has been good for the most part. The hard part is revisiting the exes and saying no when they try and start something again. That I've had to do a few times now but it's nice to know they're still interested. I've been sucking at making more time for me, but I think that will only change when I have reason enough to put my foot down, as far as I have something else that is a priority or I hit my breaking point in starving myself for some 'me' time.
6. Become more committed to things. I am not doing so good here either and I think that started out with easy commitments is what will give me the courage to commit on a more serious level. I'm committed to the easy things that require little extended effort on my part, my job, the dogs, IMPS which is the rescue I work with the most, my family, trying to further develop my career. However, I am dodging all the big things, or at least those 'bigger' steps that I really want and need to take. However, I am pretty committed to not only the gym but getting in shape on my own (as I'm running on my lunch hour) so I guess that's something in itself, right?
So .. in three months, I've made progress in some areas and I'm still sucking in others. While it sucks exercising so much I enjoy the feeling afterwards and I like seeing the results slowly appear. I think that as that progresses further the rest will probably fall into place or at least make progress in that direction, because I'm guessing my mood will improve even more so that things will be easier to get into.
I need to add a new goal .. quit rambling so dang much!!
